"Hear ye, hear ye!! The Circuit Court of Crawdad County is now in session. All rise for the honorable Judge Batzen Belfry."

The people in the courtroom all rose in unison as the judge made his way to the bench and sat down.

"Be seated", the judge said. "Does the prosecution wish to make an opening statement?"

"Yes your honor"

Joe Flannigan, a 20 year veteran in the prosecutors office, rose and addressed the jury."

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the people intend to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that the defendant, Miss Lucy LeGulp, is guilty of the heinous crime of murder. We will present evidence that will leave no doubt as to her guilt. All we ask of you, the members of the jury, is to keep an open mind as you listen to testimony that, at first blush, may seem unbelievable. We're not claiming that Miss LeGulp dispatched her victims using traditional methods such as shooting, stabbing, or poisoning. What we will prove is that the defendant, with malice of forethought, lured her victims into her home .... and ATE them. Not only that, but the victims were quite probably alive and fully conscious as they slid down her throat to a hideous demise in the steamy cauldron of her stomach."

The jury and the people in the gallery gasped as they heard the prosecutors words. All sorts of rumors about the exact nature of Lucy LeGulp's crimes had been floating around the small southern town's gossip mills. Everybody had their own theories regarding the series of mysterious disappearances that had taken place over the past several months. Most of the townsfolk were shocked when the sheriff arrested the town's librarian and charged her with being responsible for the disappearances.

"Order in the court, Order in the court!!" the judge exclaimed, as the sound of his gavel echoed through the courtroom.

"Any more outbursts like that and I'll clear the courtroom. Mr. Prosecutor, have you finished your opening remarks?"

"Yes your honor"

"Very well, does the defense wish to make an opening statement?"

The defendant's lawyer, a young local attorney named Justin Landrieu, stood and began speaking."

"Yes your honor. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, over the course of this trial, you're going to hear the prosecution allege that my client, Miss LeGulp, is guilty of committing acts which defy all credulity. We will show that the outrageous accusations of the prosecution are, in fact, baseless. In the end, you will have no recourse but to find my client not guilty. Thank you."

"Mr prosecutor, are you prepared to call your first witness?"

"Yes your honor, the people call Lester Goodman to the stand."

A rather portly gentleman in a well worn gray suit rose from his seat in the gallery, made his way to the witness stand, and was sworn in.

"Mr Goodman would you please state your name and occupation for the record?"

"My name's Lester Goodman, and I'm the sheriff over in Guano county."

"Sheriff, have you ever had any past dealings with the defendant?"

"A couple of years ago, we had a similar outbreak of missing men in my county. During the course of our investigation, we came to have strong suspicions that Miss LeGulp was somehow involved."

"Why was that?"

"It turns out that at one time or another, Miss LeGulp was seen in the company of all of the gentlemen who eventually wound up missing. In fact, witnesses stated on the record that they observed all of the victims entering the defendants house at one time or another. The strange thing is, none of the witnesses could recall any of the victims actually leaving the defendants house."

"You refer to the missing people as victims. Please explain."

"As you well know, having lived in these parts most of your life, folks around here don't tend to stray too far from home. And, if they do go anywhere, everybody knows about it. These folks just flat out vanished without a trace. We had dogs out searching just about every square inch of the county, and couldn't turn up anything. As a last resort, and based on the testimony of the witnesses I mentioned earlier, we obtained a warrant to search Miss LeGulp's house."

"Did you find anything?"

"Nope, we didn't find anything. We kind of thought we might be dealing with a Jeffrey Dahmer sort of thing, so, we looked all over for body parts, but didn't turn up so much as a finger bone."

"What happened then?"

"Since we didn't have any bodies or concrete evidence linking Miss LeGulp to the disappearances, and since we didn't have any other suspects, we pretty much had to suspend the investigation. A few days later, Miss LeGulp quit her job and left town for parts unknown. A couple of weeks after that, I got a call from Bo Jenkins over at the sewage plant. He wanted me to come over and take a look at something. He seemed pretty shook up over the phone, so I got in the car and hurried on over there."

"And, what was the cause of his concern?"

"Well, it seems that he'd been cleaning out one of the sludge filters when something caught his eye. I guess he nearly had a heart attack when he picked it up and saw that it appeared to be a tiny human skeleton. I nearly keeled over too when he showed it to me."

Gasps once again came from the gallery. The prosecutor walked over to his table and picked up a plastic bag and handed it to the sheriff.

"Sheriff, take a look at the bag and tell me what you see."

"That appears to be the same skeleton that old Bo showed to me at the sewage plant."

The prosecutor handed the bag to the jury so that they could pass it around amongst themselves. Then, he entered it into evidence as peoples' exhibit 1.

"Now sheriff, once you were in posession of the skeleton, what did you do next?"

"We sent it off to the FBI, along with various personal articles that we hoped would contain samples of the victims' DNA."

"Did the FBI come to any conclusions based on what you sent them."

Yes sir. They concluded that the DNA in the skeleton's bone marrow exactly matched the DNA in one of the hair samples we had provided to them. The hair sample belonged to a gentleman named Billy McClellen. He was the 10th and final person reported missing, and was last seen entering Miss LeGulp's home."

"Did you perform any additional analysis on the skeleton?"

"Yes sir. We did a dental check, and the skeleton's teeth exactly matched Billy McClellen's dental records."

"And how did you come to be called as a witness in this case?"

"When I read in the paper that a bunch of your folks had also turned up missing without a trace, I contacted your sheriff and told him about the strange goings on in my county. During the course of our conversation, he mentioned that their prime suspect was also named Lucy LeGulp. We later ascertained that they were indeed the same person, the defendant."

"Thank you very much for your testimony sheriff. Your witness Mr Landrieu."

The defense attorney stood up and slowly approached the witness.

"I just have one brief question for you sheriff. In the course of your investigation, did you uncover any evidence directly linking my client to the skeleton found at the sewage plant?"

"Well no, but ...."

"Thank you sheriff, that's all. I have no further questions for this witness your honor."

"You may step down sheriff. Mr Flannigan, call your next witness."

"Yes your honor. The prosecution calls Miss Elvira Grundy to the stand."

As Elvira Grundy made her way to the witness stand, she cast an accusing glance at Lucy, who simply continued to sit calmly in her chair, smiling.

"Miss Grundy, did you personally observe any unusual activity at the home of Lucy LeGulp in the days and weeks prior to her arrest."

"Well, I thought it rather strange that every time Miss LeGulp came home in the company of a man, that it was always a different man. I never saw the same fellow enter her home more than once."

"Exactly how many men are we talking about here Miss Grundy?"

"Oh, at least ten that I know of. I sit out on my porch nearly every evening, and can't help but notice things like that. It was like living next door to a bordello!!"

"Did you notice anything else unusual?"

"Yes. After a while, it dawned on me that even thought I had observed many gentlemen entering Miss LeGulp's house, I never saw any of them leave. Even if they had left in the wee hours, I'd have surely heard them. I'm a very light sleeper you know."

"Were you acquainted with any of the men who entered the defendant's home?"

"Well, of course. This is a very small town."

"Is there anything else about these men that you'd like to tell the court?"

"Yes indeed. Of course I was aware, like most everyone else on town, that a number of men were missing. Well, I was sitting on my porch one night when it suddenly struck me that I had observed all of the missing men entering Miss LeGulp's home at one time or another. And, as I mentioned earlier, I didn't see any of them leave. I thought that was certainly very strange, so I immediately called the sheriff and told him what I knew. I thought it was my civic duty."

"And the people certainly thank you for your help Elvira. That's all the questions I have. Your witness Mr. landrieu."

"Thank you. Miss Grundy, while you're sitting on your porch in the evenings, do you occasionally find yourself sipping on a cool beverage?"

"Well certainly. It's very sultry around here in the evenings you know, and someone my age has to be very conscious of maintaining her fluid levels."

"Is it possible that some of those beverages might have contained a wee amount of alcohol?"

"Well, I do like a little snort on occasion, for medicinal purposes only of course."

"Miss Grundy, isn't it true that in actuality, you generally kill a pint or more of vodka nearly every evening while you're sitting on the porch observing the comings and goings of your neighbors?"

"WELL, I never!!"

"No need to get huffy. If you'd like, I could call Luke Peters, the clerk over at the liquor store, to testify about your purchasing habits?"

"That won't be necessary Mr Landrieu. I will admit to slowly sipping a few vodka and tonics each evening, if it will make you happy."

"Is it possible that later on in the evening, after several drinks, that you may have dozed off in your chair and perhaps failed to notice Miss LeGulp's gentlemen friends leaving? Isn't it also entirely possible that they left through the back door?"

"Well, I suppose it's possible, but ....."

"That's all Miss Grundy. You can step down now."

"But, but ..."

"That's ALL Miss Grundy!!"

Elvira Grundy stormed off the witness stand, cast a few contemptuous glances at Justin Landrieu, and then hurriedly left the courtroom.

"Does the prosecution have any more witnesses?" the judge asked.

"Yes your honor, we have one more witness. The people call sheriff Bubba Wadkins to the stand."

The sheriff, a tall muscular man, strode confidently to the witness stand and was sworn in.

"Sheriff Wadkins, what exactly was it that made you initially suspect that Lucy LeGulp was perhaps responsible for the disappearances?"

"A couple of things. We really didn't have any solid leads until Elvira Grundy contacted us and provided us some very interesting information regarding male visitors to Miss LeGulp's home. Shortly after that, I received a call from Sheriff Goodman over in Guano county. He told me all about his investigation of Miss LeGulp, and about the subsequent discovery of the tiny skeleton. It didn't take a genius to notice that whenever Lucy LeGulp moves into a town, men seem to start disappearing. Admittedly, the skeleton kind of threw us for a loop. We had no way to explain how something like that could exist. We tossed around a few wild theories, but none of them made any sense."

"What were some of those theories, Bubba?"

"Well, some of them were so wild that they don't bear repeating. However, the one theory that we kept coming back to is that the victim, whose skeleton we found, was somehow shrunk either before or after his demise."

"Shrunk?"

"There's just no other way to explain the existence of the skeleton. It's possible that somehow the skeleton itself could have been shrunk by some sort of natural process, but every expert we talked to told us that they were unaware of any way to do something like that."

"Did you eventually decide to pursue any particular theory?"

"Yes we did. As hard as it was for me and Sheriff Goodman to accept it, we finally agreed that we must be dealing with something not entirely natural."

"Do you mean something like witchcraft?"

"Exactly. The problem was, we had no proof that Miss LeGulp was working some sort of juju on her victims. We needed evidence."

"And how exactly did you plan on acquiring said evidence?"

"We figured the best way was to have one of our detectives go undercover and attempt to become friendly with Miss LeGulp, if you know what I mean."

"And is that what you did?"

"Yes. We had to be sure that the person was somebody Miss LeGulp had never seen before. Fortunately, one of sheriff Goodman's new deputies, Pete Williams, was a complete newcomer to the area. We convinced him to volunteer for the job."

"What happened next?"

"Well, we had Pete start hanging out at the Library where Miss LeGulp works. He's a pretty friendly fellow, and it didn't take him long to strike up a conversation with the defendant. After a few days, she invited him over to her place for dinner. When the big day came, we hooked Pete up with a small wireless microphone, and staked out her house. We told him that if he felt like he was in any danger, to start yelling like crazy and we'd be inside the house in no time flat. Anyway, everything seemed to be going according to plan. Pete showed up at Miss LeGulp's place at the appointed time, and she let him in."

"Go on."

"For the first hour or so, nothing unusual happened. Their conversations were just the sort of things you'd expect two young folks to be talking about. About an hour and a half into their liaison we heard a strange hissing sound, kind of like the sound that comes from an aerosol can. Immediately after that, the conversation stopped. We could hear Miss LeGulp giggling, but Pete wasn't saying anything. We figured maybe they were making out or something. Then the defendant started to talk again."

"Your honor, at this time we'd like to play a short tape for the court, and enter it into evidence as Peoples' exhibit 2. After we play the first tape, we'd like to play another short tape, which is actually an enhanced version of a portion of the first tape. We'd like to then enter that into evidence as Peoples' exhibit 3"

"Very well" said the judge, "You may proceed."

The prosecutor put a tape into the recorder that was sitting on his table.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the voice you'll be hearing next will be that of the defendant, Miss Lucy LeGulp". Then, he pressed "PLAY". The jury listened attentively.

"Gee Pete, I guess this isn't exactly what you expected when I invited you over for dinner. I really should have told you that you were going to BE dinner. But then, you might not have accepted my invitation. Anyway, bye bye sweetie. I hope you're not afraid of really dark places!!"

Then there was a barely audible squeak followed by what seemed to be a swallowing sound. After that, all that could be heard was some sloshing noises and what seemed to be a heartbeat, followed shortly thereafter by the muffled sound of the police breaking down Lucy's front door. Then there was silence.

The jury was transfixed by what they had just heard.

"Now, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'd like to play a highly amplified version of the squeaking sound you may have heard immediately after Miss LeGulp stopped speaking. We'll also play some of the sounds that followed, with the background noises filtered out. Please listen carefully. I want to warn you in advance that some of the material you're about to hear may be quite disturbing". He then pushed the play button.

"Oh God no! What the hell are you doing? Please don't! No! Please don't eat me! Somebody help me! No! Nooooooooooooo!!!!"

The voice vanished momentarily, replaced by the sort of sound something would make if it were sliding across a slick, slimy surface. It was followed a few seconds later by a dull splashing sound, as though something had fallen into a thick liquid. Then there was more splashing, followed once again by the terrified voice of Pete Williams.

"Oh fuck!! I must be in her stomach. How the hell can this be happening. Somebody please help me!! Oh man, is this shit ever nasty. Got to pull myself out of this funky crap somehow. Ah, there we go, that's better. Are you guys still listening? Get me the fuck out of here!! Now!!!! Oh shit, I just fell back in again. Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!". At that point, the sound abruptly came to an end.

The prosecutor removed the tape and placed it into evidence, along with the previous tape. The jury, as well as the people in the gallery, appeared shell shocked at what they had heard. Some of them were crying. Meanwhile, Lucy LeGulp sat impassively, as though she were bored with the entire proceeding.

"Sheriff, at some point, did you find it necessary to forcibly enter the home of the defendant?"

"Yes sir. Me and my deputy, Cletus Jones, kicked down her door just a couple of minutes after we last heard from Pete. We then looked all around her place, but could find no trace of him anywhere. At that point, we took Miss LeGulp into custody."

"What did you do then?"

"Well, since we suspected that the defendant must somehow be shrinking her victims, and based on the words you heard Miss LeGulp utter on the first tape you played, we began to think the unthinkable. What if she had shrunk poor Pete, and then EATEN him!! We knew that the hospital had all sorts of new fangled equipment, so we hurried on over there to see if they might have something that could help us out."

"Were they able to provide you with any assistance?"

"They were indeed. They've got some kind of fancy machine that lets them produce live images of the inside of folks bodies. We hooked up Miss LeGulp, and the resulting pictures were, were ....."

At this point, the sheriff broke down in tears.

"That's OK sheriff, just sit back for a minute. Your honor, at this point the people would like to play a video showing the results of the scan of the defendant's abdomen."

Justin landrieu jumped to his feet. "OBJECTION your honor!!"

"Overruled. Please proceed with playing the video Mister prosecutor."

"Thank you your honor. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, as disturbing as the audio tapes were that I played for you earlier, I forewarn you that this will probably be far more disturbing. Lower the courtroom lights and start the video tape please."

The tape had barely begun playing when a audible gasp again arose from the courtroom. The silhouette of what appeared to be a tiny struggling man could be plainly seen inside Lucy LeGulp's stomach. The ghostly image seemed to be alternately pounding against the walls of her stomach and then sliding backward, as though he was standing on a very slippery surface and couldn't keep his footing. Eventually, he fell down and ceased struggling.

"Please stop the tape, I think we've seen enough. Your honor, please accept this tape as peoples' exhibit 4."

"So ordered."

"Sheriff, could you please tell us what happened next?"

The sheriff took a deep breath and tried to gather his composure.

"Well, as soon as the scan started, and we saw what appeared to be the image of a live man trapped inside the defendant, I immediately tried to contact a judge to issue a search warrant so that we could pump her stomach. The defendant refused to allow us to do so without a warrant. However, it took us nearly an hour to find someone. Once we obtained the warrant, we immediately proceeded to pump her stomach."

"And did you find anything?"

"No, we didn't find anything you wouldn't ordinarily expect to find inside a woman's stomach. We figured that by the time we finally got in there, that Pete had already been digested and sucked into the defendant's intestines."

"Did you take any further action to procure evidence?"

"Yes we did. We figured that sooner or later nature would take it's course, and that Pete's remains would show up in one of the defendant's bowel movements. We placed her in custody and assigned her to a cell with a toilet to which we had affixed a drainpipe filter to catch any solid waste. Then we just waited. About two hours later, the guard heard a flush. When we examined the filter we didn't find any remains, but we figured that next time we'd probably get lucky. About four hours later, she flushed again. When we went to examine the filter, we saw that it had somehow become dislodged, allowing most of the solid waste to flow into the sewer system."

"What did you do then?"

"We kind of panicked, because we figured Pete's bones were probably in that batch of waste. We immediately called the sewer plant and asked the supervisor if there was any way they could quickly set up a filter to capture anything that flowed into the plant in the next hour or so. Thank goodness, he was able to do so. About a half hour later, we spotted what we were looking for, a tiny skeleton. Tests proved conclusively that it was indeed the remains of Pete Williams. We then formally charged Lucy LeGulp with the crime of murder."

"I'm just curious sheriff. Has anybody else turned up missing since the defendant was placed into custody?"

"No sir, the disappearances have completely stopped."

"Thank you very much for your testimony sheriff. Your witness Mr Landrieu."

Justin Landrieu stood up and slowly walked toward the sheriff with his hands in his pockets and a quizzical expression on his face.

"Sheriff, are you telling this court with a straight face that you honestly believe that my client, Miss Lucy LeGulp, somehow shrank Sheriff Goodman's deputy and ate him?"

"Yes sir, that's what I'm saying."

"Isn't it true sheriff that you and the prosecutor, both of you being up for election this year, concocted this absurd theory to cover your butts because you couldn't come up with a legitimate suspect in this case?"

"OBJECTION your honor!!" bellowed Joe Flannigan, leaping to his feet.

"Sustained. Mr Landrieu, you'll kindly refrain from personal attacks in my courtroom!!"

"Sorry your honor, I just got a little carried away. It won't happen again."

"See that it doesn't."

"Yes sir. Now sheriff, I listened very carefully to the tapes the prosecutor played, and watched with rapt attention to his little video, and they were certainly interesting. However, I just have one teensy problem."

Justin walked over to his table and picked up a book that was laying there."

"Sheriff, do you know what this is?"

"It appears to be our evidence logbook."

"Correct!! Now sheriff, I've spent a considerable amount of time looking through this book the last few days, and I can't seem to find any entries for those tapes that tracks their chain of custody. Would you like to take a look and see if you can find anything?"

The sheriff grabbed the book and started frantically flipping the pages. "Damn, I know there's got to be something in here somewhere!! I told Cletus to make sure this stuff was all done proper."

"Take your time sheriff. I'm sure you couldn't have possibly overlooked something as important as this."

After about 10 minutes, the sheriff handed the book back to Justin.

"It appears as though in all the excitement we somehow neglected to make the usual entries in the logbook. But I assure you that we followed all the normal procedures?"

"Sheriff, I hope you don't mind if I don't find a whole lot of comfort in your assurances."

"Are you questioning my integrity Sir?"

"Oh, Not at all. But forgive me If I find this oversight somewhat troubling. Sheriff, perhaps you'd like to tell the court what the purpose is of meticulously tracking the chain of custody of evidence. I'm sure the jury might find your answer to be quite illuminating."

"It's to make sure that the evidence isn't tampered with," the sheriff said tersely.

"So, if the custody wasn't meticulously tracked, then we have only your word that nobody took these tapes and somehow edited them in such a way as to incriminate my client. Isn't that correct sheriff."

"That's right," said the sheriff, glowering at Justin.

"Then there's the matter of these darned little skeletons that seem to keep popping up at various sewage plants. I believe you neglected to mention earlier if you have any evidence directly linking my client to the latest skeleton that so conveniently turned up. Do you have any such evidence."

" No, but ... "

"So, that skeleton could have come from anywhere. Isn't that correct sheriff!!"

"Well yes, but ...."

"One last question sheriff. During the course of your investigation, did you turn up any device or magic potion or anything that could be used to shrink a man to a size such that he could be swallowed alive!!"

"No, we did not."

"Thank you sheriff, that will be all. You can step down now."

Sheriff Wadkins stepped own, but not before casting a couple of threatening glances Justin's way. Justin just looked at him impassively.

"Does the prosecution have any further witnesses?" the judge bellowed.

"No your honor, the prosecution rests."

"Very well. Mr Landrieu, do you wish to call any witnesses."

"Only one, your honor. The defense calls Miss Lucy LeGulp to the stand."

The courtroom buzzed as Lucy stood up and walked confidently to the witness box. She smiled at the jury, paying particular attention to juror #7, a fellow named Billy Simonds. She'd established eye contact with him early on in the trial, and it was apparent the he was becoming totally mesmerized by her.

"Could you state your name and occupation for the record?"

"My name is Lucy LeGulp, and I'm the town librarian."

"Lucy, I've just got a couple of quick questions for you. First of all, have you been shrinking and eating the good residents of this town?"

"Why goodness no. The whole idea is totally preposterous. I don't see how the sheriff and the prosecutor could have concocted such a hair brained theory."

"Well Lucy, how do you explain the fact that all those men were seen entering your home but not leaving?"

"That's easy. I told them all to leave by the back door to avoid unnecessary scrutiny by some of my busybody neighbors," she said, casting an icy glance in the direction of Elvira Grundy, who had returned to the courtroom to watch the proceedings.

"But what about that audio tape where you seemed to imply that you were going to eat Pete Williams?"

"I have no idea where that came from. I certainly didn't say anything of the sort. I can only guess that the sheriff and his cronies somehow manufactured this tape to incriminate me. God only knows why they'd do such a thing."

"LIAR!!!" shouted Sheriff Wadkins, jumping to his feet. "You're a damned liar!!"

"Order in the court. Sheriff, one more outburst like that and I'll have you removed from the courtroom. Do you understand?"

"Sorry your honor."

"Please continue Mr Landrieu."

"I'm curious Lucy, whatever happened to Pete anyway? How come he wasn't around when the sheriff burst into your home?"

"I have no idea. After dinner, Mr Williams attempted to take liberties with me. Not being that kind of girl, I slapped him and told him to leave. The last I saw him, he was skulking out the back door."

"So, you didn't eat him?"

"Goodness no," Lucy giggled.

"But what about that video showing what appeared to be a tiny human form struggling inside your stomach?"

"I can only assume that whoever created those phony audio tapes was also responsible for doctoring that video. The whole idea of a tiny man in my stomach is preposterous."

"Do you have anything else you'd like to say?"

Lucy looked at the Jury, locking her gaze once again on juror #7.

"All I want to say is that I'm totally innocent of all these ridiculous charges. I hope you good folks will see through all these horrible lies and find me not guilty. Thank you."

"Thank you Lucy. Your witness Mr Flannigan."

"Miss LeGulp, how do you explain the fact that whenever you move to a town, people who visit your home seem to start disappearing without a trace?"

"I believe explaining stuff like that is your job sir. It's certainly not my fault that you and the police department lack the brains to come up with a credible theory to explain the disappearances."

"Your Honor, I move to strike the defendant's answer!!"

"Sorry Mr Prosecutor, but you asked a smart-ass question, and she was entitled to answer in kind. I suggest that you proceed, and quickly. I'd like to wrap this up before lunch."

"Yes your honor. So, Miss LeGulp, do you have any theories about this case that you'd like to share with us?"

"Well, did you ever consider that somebody, perhaps a highly sexually repressed individual, might be watching my house and targeting my visitors for some sort of biblical punishment? Have you considered searching Elvira Grundy's home?"

"WELL I NEVER!!!" shrieked Elvira Grundy from the back of the courtroom.

"And you probably never will, you old bat!!" Lucy retorted.

"Order in the court!!" the judge bellowed. "I've had just about enough of this nonsense. One more outburst and I'm throwing everybody in jail for contempt. Now let's get on with this thing!!"

The prosecutor, feeling that he could gain no particular advantage by further questioning, decided he'd better not risk doing any more damage to his case."

"No more questions your honor."

Lucy stepped down from the witness stand, cast one more sultry glance in the direction of juror #7, and returned to her seat.

"OK Gentlemen, closing remarks please. You first Mr Landrieu."

"Thank's your honor. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, what you've seen here today is an example of our legal system gone mad. What we have here is a case based solely on the deluded fantasies of the prosecution, and backed up with nothing but fabricated evidence. It's the prosecutor and sheriff that should be facing jail time, not my client. I ask you to consider the evidence, or lack thereof, and render the only possible verdict, NOT GUILTY!! Thank you."

"Your turn Mr Flannigan."

"Thank you your honor. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I think that I have clearly presented you with more than enough evidence to convince you of the defendant's guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. Now, I'll be the first to admit that mistakes were made in handling some of the evidence in this case. But heck, most of you have known Sheriff Bubba Wadkins all your lives, and you know him to be a man or honor and integrity. To suggest that he would purposely tamper with evidence is outrageous and slanderous. The fact is, those tapes you heard and saw can only lead you to one possible conclusion. That conclusion is that Miss Lucy LeGulp somehow shrank Pete Williams and ate him. You cannot let her heinous crime go unpunished. I ask you, in the name of justice, to render a verdict of guilty. Thank you."

The judge read the jury their instructions and sent them off to deliberate. Lucy LeGulp was ushered into a guarded lounge to await the verdict, accompanied by Justin Landrieu. Some sandwiches was brought in to them, and they ate lunch while they waited.

"Well Lucy, I think we got us a pretty good chance here. We sure did luck out with those evidence logs. I can't believe they'd be that sloppy, but I'm not complaining."

"Justice works in mysterious ways Justin. I'm sure that I was never meant to be convicted of these ridiculous charges."

About three hours later, the bailiff popped his head into the room.

"The jury's back folks!!"

"OK Lucy, this it. Let's go."

Everybody walked back into the courtroom and took their seats.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, have you reached a verdict?"

"We have your honor," said the foreman.

"How say you?"

"To the sole charge of premeditated murder we find the defendant, Lucy LeGulp ..... Not guilty."

A mixture of cheers and cries of outrage arose from the gallery. Lucy had a broad smile on her face as she hugged Justin Landrieu. Sheriff Wadkins and Elvira Grundy scowled at Lucy, and then hastily exited from the courtroom.

Lucy went with some court officials to gather up her belongings and to sign some release papers. Justin wandered off with the prosecutor, who wanted to interview the jury. Afterwards, they met up in the courtroom lounge.

"Lucy, lets go back to my office so we can take care of a few things. Then, I'm sure you have plenty of things you'd to do."

When the got to Justin's office, they sat down and relaxed for the first time all day.

"Well Lucy, it looks like we really had luck on our side."

"What do you mean?"

"Joe Flannigan interviewed the jury, and it turns out that their first vote was 11-1 to convict. One juror held out, and eventually managed to convince the rest of the jurors to change their votes."

"Was it juror number seven?"

"Why yes. How did you know?"

"I just had a funny feeling that he was on our side," Lucy said smiling sweetly.

"OK Lucy, now we need to talk about the little matter of my fee. Here's an invoice with the number of hours I worked plus a list of all my itemized expenses. The total damage is $18,000. Now, how do you want to pay for this?"

Lucy looked at the invoice, then looked at Justin and sighed.

"Wow, that's a lot of money. Can't you cut me a break?"

"Sorry Lucy, but a guy's got to eat."

Lucy's lips curled up in funny sort of smile at Justin's last comment.

"But Justin, I need to eat too. Can't we work something out?"

"Business is business. I'd be happy to take the pink slip for your car. Hey, those are a couple of nice rings you're wearing. I'm sure I can get something for them. What else have you got?"

"Gee, and here I thought you weren't a sleazy shark like most other lawyers," Lucy said as she subtly reached inside her purse and pulled out a small object shaped like a butane lighter.

Hey, I got you off didn't I. You should be grateful. Now, either you pay up, or I'll have no choice but to report you to the credit bureaus and garnish all your bank accounts and future wages."

Lucy looked at Justin with a piercing stare that sent shudders up and down his spine. Then she stood up and walked over to where he was sitting.

"You know Justin, you really are a smarmy little toad. I think I have the perfect solution to my payment problem."

She held the object in her hand up to Justin's head, pressed down on it's top, and spewed a fine mist into his face. Justin gasped and immediately vanished from sight. The next thing he knew, he was clasped tightly in Lucy's hand, and she was glowering at him with huge menacing eyes and teeth.

"I hate to break this to you Justin, but I really was guilty of all those things they said I did. I actually ate all those people, and guess what, now I'm going to eat you!!"

"Hey wait, we can work this out. I'll just chalk this off as a pro bono case. Yeah, that's it!! Everything was free, no charge!! Please let me go!!"

"Sorry asshole. I've been cooped up in a cell for over a month without being able to eat anybody, and I'm mighty hungry. I'm afraid it's gullet time for you Justin. Bye Bye!!"

Lucy bent her head back at an impossible angle and opened her mouth so wide that when she dangled Justin over her gaping maw, he could actually see her esophagus ... and the darkness beyond. He tried to scream as Lucy dropped him into her mouth, but the sound never came out. When Lucy felt him bounce against her throat wall, she swallowed, sending him on his way to her eagerly awaiting stomach to be digested. As his head pushed its way through the opening to her stomach, and the pungent fragrance of her digestive juices assaulted his nose, the scream he had stifled earlier was released. Suddenly, unexpectedly, he reversed direction and began sliding UPWARD though Lucy's esophagus, emerging a few seconds later in her mouth. Then, she spit him out into her hand and smiled at him.

"Gee Justin, those exercises I've been working on to control my esophagus muscles seem to have paid off. When you were about halfway down I started to feel a little remorseful, so I decided to un-swallow you. Perhaps eating you is being a tad harsh. What do you think?"

A blubbering Justin nodded his head in vigorous agreement at the prospect of gaining a reprieve from Lucy's stomach. Suddenly, Lucy's smile turned into a wicked grin.

"Nah, I've changed my mind. I've decided to eat you after all!!"

Lucy quickly tossed the surprised Justin back into her mouth and swallowed him again before he knew what was happening. This time, his journey wasn't interrupted until he splashed down face-first in a steamy pool of digestive juices.

"God, I'm such a bitch!! Lucy snickered as she walked out of Justin's office. "Lawyers all deserve to be eaten anyway!!"

She was thankful that the police hadn't investigated the contents of her purse a little more carefully before placing it in the property room. Somebody would have gotten the surprise of their life if they'd tried to use her "lighter" to fire up a smoke.

It was only a few short blocks to her home, and Lucy walked them quickly. She figured that it would probably be best if she left town as soon as possible, but she had a number of things that needed attending to first. She had only been home for a few minutes when someone knocked at the door. She opened the door and smiled knowingly at her visitor. It was Billy Simonds, the juror who had helped secure her acquittal.

"Hello Billy, I've been expecting you."

"You have? I'm not actually sure why I came here. I just felt this strange compulsion to see you."

Billy walked into Lucy's house and sat down on the couch. Lucy sat down next to him.

"Hmmm, let me see if I can help you figure out why you came to see me. What were you thinking about as you walked over here?"

"This might seem weird, but I couldn't stop thinking about your mouth. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it all day. It's so ......"

"Inviting?" Lucy said, finishing his sentence.

"Yeah, that's it. I feel so strange. I keep thinking about what it would be like if ......"

"I swallowed you alive?" Lucy said, smiling seductively at Billy.

"Yeah. I know we found you not guilty, but ....."

"Let me tell you a little secret Billy," Lucy said, looking into his eyes. "I actually did eat all those people. They all wanted me to swallow them, so I did. You want me to swallow you too. That's why you're here, isn't it?"

"I .. I think so. I'm so confused. I can't believe I want to be eaten."

"You do Billy, I can tell. There's no use fighting it. I'm in kind of a hurry, so, if you want me to swallow you I've got to do it now."

"OK," Billy said in a zombylike tone.

"Close your eyes and breathe deeply," Lucy said as she pulled the container containing the shrink spray from her purse.

Billy closed his eyes. In a few seconds, his face was bathed in a cool mist. When he opened his eyes, he was clutched gently in Lucy's hand. She held him up to her lips and briefly opened her mouth wide so he could see where he was about to go.

"OK Billy, I'm going to eat you now. Do you want me to swallow you head first or feet first."

"Uh, head first please."

"Good choice. That's the way most guys like to go down my throat. By the way, thanks again for helping me at the trial today."

"No problem. Uh, are you sure I really want to do this?"

"Trust me Billy, if you let me leave town without eating you, you'd never forgive yourself. You'd think about it for the rest of your life. Now, just relax and don't worry. You'll be in my stomach before you know it."

Lucy tipped her head back, opened her mouth, licked him all over until he was covered in gooey saliva, and then gently laid him face first onto her tongue. At first her tongue was arched up so as to obstruct the view of her throat. Then she slowly started to lower her tongue while at the same time tipping her head further back, causing Billy to begin sliding toward the rear of her mouth. His head finally slipped beneath her uvula and through the slowly widening gap between her tongue and palate, until it pressed up against the wall of her throat. Then she swallowed, enveloping Pete in the soft tissues of her throat, and sending him to digestive oblivion in her stomach.

"Whew, I'm glad I ate him before he changed his mind. I hate it when these guys start second guessing themselves. Ooooh, he's really kicking up a fuss down there. It's never quite what they expect. Oh well, he'll settle down soon. Dang, it's getting late. I'd better start packing."

Lucy started gathering up her belongings. She always traveled light in case she had to beat a hasty exit out of town. She was usually real good at gauging when it was time to leave, but she'd gotten sloppy lately. She kicked herself in the butt for hanging around one last night to eat that stupid cop. She'd suspected a setup as soon as he walked in the door, but she wasn't entirely sure until he began screaming as she was about to toss him in her mouth. Oh well, live and learn. She'd never make that mistake again.

She loaded all her stuff in her car, went back inside, and then fired up her laptop to perform a quick job search. She'd just logged onto the internet when she heard a knock at the door. Lucy smiled. She kind of expected one last visitor, but was beginning to think he might not stop by. She walked over and opened the door.

"Why Cletus, what in heavens name are you doing here? Did the sheriff send you over to spy on me?"

"Heck no. Bubba's been chewing my butt out for the last two hours about messing up those evidence logs and that drainpipe filter."

"So, it was YOU!!" Lucy exclaimed, feigning surprise. "How can I ever thank you?"

"Well, you can help me find a place to hide out from Bubba for a while."

"Hmmm," Lucy said hungrily, licking her lips. "You know Cletus, I think I know someplace you can hide where nobody will ever find you. It's the LEAST I can do for you. By the way, why did you do those things to help me out anyway."

"Shoot, it would have been a crying shame for someone with your special talents to rot away in jail. I just couldn't let that happen."

"Special talents? Why, whatever do you mean Cletus?"

"Dang, we both know that you can shrink guys and eat them. When I saw Pete dancing around in your stomach, I thought I was going to have a freaking heart attack. You're the sexiest woman I've ever seen Lucy, and I want you to eat ME!! Please!! I want to slide down your sexy throat and melt in your stomach."

"Gee Cletus, all this talk about you wanting me to eat you is really making me ... HOT!!! Are you sure the sheriff's not waiting outside to take me to jail again."

"I swear on a stack of bibles Lucy. PLEEEEZE EAT ME!!"

Lucy loved it when guys begged to be swallowed. Justin and Billy just didn't quite deliver the satisfaction she craved. Justin was a sleaze and Billy was kind of a wuss, but Cletus ... he was going to be fun.

"OK sweetie, I'll eat you. Just hold still for a second while I shrink you. This won't hurt a bit."

Lucy spritzed Cletus with her shrink spray and in an instant he was 3 inches tall.

"Oh goody, I didn't shrink you too much. I want to be able to really feel you sliding down my throat. You're so big I just might have to swallow twice to get you all the way to my stomach. I hope you don't mind."

"Heck no!! Are you ready to eat me yet? God, I can hardly wait!!"

Lucy picked up Cletus and held him directly in front of her luscious mouth where she could tantalize him with glimpses of her juicy pink tongue.

"What's your hurry big boy. You know what? Before I actually eat you, I think I'm just going to suck on you for a while."

Lucy began alternately licking and kissing Cletus, marinating him in glistening saliva before pushing his head through her lips and playfully tickling it with the soft tip of her tongue. Then she began gently sucking on him while sliding him back and forth between her lips. Eventually, she pulled him out of her mouth and give his face several sweet caresses with the indescribably smooth underside of her tongue.

Cletus was now so aroused that he was unable to talk intelligibly. However, the rigidity of his steely boner told Lucy all she needed to know.

"Hmmm, I think it's time I quit teasing you and send you to that special hiding place I told you about. Bon voyage Cletus. You're really going to like this."

Lucy sucked Cletus entirely inside her mouth and began loading him up with saliva. He was going to be a hefty gulp, and she wanted to make sure he was well lubricated before she sent him on his way to her stomach. When she had sucked him all the way back until his head was between her tonsils, she opened her mouth to let some light in so that Cletus could have one final look at the glistening pink throat flesh that surrounded him. Then she slowly closed her mouth again and swallowed him. As she had thought, he only made it half way down on the first gulp. A second swallow was necessary to finish the job. A few seconds later, he dropped into her stomach. Lucy could feel everything as he slowly oozed through the valve at the bottom of her esophagus and splashed down inside her tummy. It caused her to have a massive orgasm.

"Oh GOD was that wonderful!!" she screamed. "Ooops, better be careful. I don't want Elvira to get all excited and call the cops again."

She could feel Cletus happily wiggling around in her stomach as she resumed her job search. Before long, she found just what she was looking for. A library in Milwaukee needed a new librarian, and she just knew she'd be perfect for the job. She sent off her resume, shut down the computer, and prepared to leave. She looked around to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything. Then she turned off the lights and left the house for the last time.

"Milwaukee sounds like a nice place," she thought to herself as she pulled out of the driveway. "I think I've kind of worn my welcome out here. Boy, I'll bet all that beer and bratwurst makes those Wisconsin guys mighty good eating. Mmmmm, Mmmmmm. Yumm!!! I can't wait to taste a few of them. I sure hope they like being eaten as much as guys around here did. Hey Cletus, are you comfy down there? Punch the wall of my stomach once if you are."

Thump!!!

"Ah yes, another satisfied customer!!" Lucy thought as she sped off down the highway.